ROCK STAR NEWS - 1980
SPECIAL SEXIST ISSUE
ROCK & THE FEMALE SEX
DEBBIE HARRY - The Intimate Details!
Debbie Harry has been labelled the Marilyn Monroe of rock. 'Blondie' lead singer and eighties sex symbol, Debbie was mobbed by Press and fans at the London reception where I first met her. The interview had already been arranged, I said hello to Debbie, she politely thanked me for introducing myself. We met a few days later, in the garden of the Gloucester Hotel, where Debbie had just finished interviews with a stream of journalists. We talked for half an hour and Debbie, dressed in a black silk see-through shirt, jeans and plimsolls, answered my questions uninhibitedly.
At the end of the interview she asked if I would please also mention the other members of 'Blondie' because she hated over-shadowing them. So: the other members of 'Blondie' are: Chris Stein (Debbie's boyfriend and lead guitar), Frank Infanti (second guitar), Nigel Harrison (bass), Clement Burke (drums) and James Destri (keyboards). Perhaps a rarity among female rock singers, Debbie Harry was polite and professional.
I asked Debbie Harry about the supposedly wild parties of rock, and her attitude to men is predictably basic. She discussed the female side of Roger Daltry's groupie experiences, says her orgasm is very important to her and that 'more than likely I wouldn't bother with a man again if he didn't make me come'. When I showed Debbie's interview to another female star she said: 'Now that is macho.' Debbie Harry is far too glamorous for such a masculine label - shouldn't someone invent a feminine equivalent?
Debbie Harry: In my teens all I wanted was a cute boyfriend who turned me on and took me out. I never really thought about who or what I wanted in bed. My mother was very liberal and educated me about sex - but she didn't encourage me to have sex before marriage - because it just wasn't done. So I followed the rules of the dating game - you had a boyfriend, or lots - and you went out on dates. You ran the gamut - then after a while you either got bored with dating, but still went on doing it - or you settled down with one person. But I think that attitudes to sex in America have changed since I grew up because of the Pill. Women find it easier to have sex now.
Wendy: Do you think men care if women want them just for sex?
Debbie Harry: No. When you are out meeting guys - sex is usually the mutual object. If I am going to have a one-night stand just for sex and someone comes on to me I say: 'Lets go make out, get laid, or whatever', if I want to, or tell him to piss off if I don't. It depends on me - it has nothing to do with the man - it depends if I, after a successful evening, am no longer attracted to him and he wants a repeat performance.
Wendy: Do you ever feel you have to live up to a sexy image in bed - to actually 'perform'.
Debbie Harry: Occasionally you do feel you have to put on a show in bed - but that really depends on the man you are with. Sometimes I just go along with it whatever it is.
Wendy: Do you get male groupies?
Debbie Harry: I have been involved with Chris for two years - but I do get a lot of male groupies. Lots of them are fabulous - I've got one in California who sends me bouquets of flowers every night - which is really flattering. And I've had the chance to go out with some stars. Nowadays I think that sexual compatibility is easier to find than friendship. So the most successful approach to a woman which most men ignore is a disarming one; a way of approaching her out of simple friendship and acquantanceship - as if they are trying to be your friend. Some men are direct - but I don't like the macho approach. I am not attracted to macho men, and I don't have much experience of them - but I think that their attitude - that men are always superior, is unnatural.
Wendy: People may imagine that rock stars are very wild. What shocks you sexually?
Debbie Harry: Bestiality would shock me - but luckily no one has ever suggested it to me.
Wendy: Do you think drugs make good sex?
Debbie Harry: I think drugs do sometimes make sex easier because they free your inhibitions.
Wendy: Do you think a man should ask a woman what she wants sexually?
Debbie Harry: Yes - definitely. Or if he doesn't - the woman should still try and say something like: 'Look - this isn't happening - do you want to try this - it really turns me on?' But if you are too shy to say that and the man doesn't ask you what you want, you just have to forget and try and enjoy what he is giving you - what is actually happening.
Wendy: Does it matter to you if a man brings you to orgasm?
Debbie Harry: I think that is really important. More than likely I wouldn't bother with a man again if he didn't make me come. Even though I do think there is too much emphasis on the orgasm in American men's magazines, I am glad that it is fashionable now for men to be aware of the woman's orgasm. So that they remember that women have a clitoris and it's more than just a... I think in four or five years time every man will remember that automatically and really concentrate on the women they go to bed with. Lack of concentration makes a man awful in bed.
Wendy: What makes a man good in bed?
Debbie Harry: It's not any one thing, or a set of things - it's the total. Personality is important and I also think men should let themselves be feminine, more sensual and show their emotions. I like a man who is eager to laugh in bed - either at himself or at me, or at an ironic situation like the phone ringing or the bed falling down. Sometimes you can have a terrible time with a guy - then the next time it can be great - go on and on - so you don't think of anything else the next day. You can make out with somebody all the way through, but it still doesn't happen, you aren't satisfied and you think, 'Well - is it happening or not.' Then afterwards you suddenly get a great feeling like you do when you drink a wine with a terrific, unforgettable aftertaste.
Reprinted from the book 'What Makes A Man G.I.B.' (Good in Bed) by Wendy Leigh. Reprinted by kind permission of the Publishers Fredrick Muller Ltd. London
Debbie diets to protect her figure, and for exercises "I like swimming, I'm attracted to skating, and plenty of f...ing. Chris exercises in his sleep, tossing and turning, he does about a mile and a half every night.
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